


Back To The Sea

by Mosspool13



Series: WidoFjord Week 2019 [3]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Love Confessions, M/M, Widofjord Week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 05:43:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19266985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mosspool13/pseuds/Mosspool13
Summary: "Are you sure, Fjord?" Caleb had asked him, something temperate in his posture, unsure, hesitant."I'm sure. This crazy snake god of mine isn't anyone else's problem. I need to figure out this shit without putting you all into danger." Fjord had nodded at Nott then, "'sides, you guys have somewhere else you need to be.""We will... miss you." Caleb had finally said, awkwardly, after a long beat of silence. The deck of The Ball-Eater had seemed expansive between them, suddenly, as though they were on different sides of the same coin. Fjord had held out his hand, scarred palm face-up."You'll make it work." He'd said.Caleb had taken that palm in his, scarred palm to scarred palm, and whispered, "We'll make it work."





	Back To The Sea

**Author's Note:**

> For WidoFjord (Fjordgast) Week: Day Three: Canon Quote, Blood Pact

_"So it is feels... good to be back here?"_

_"Yeah, it does. I would... I would live right on the water if I could."_

_"So you... stay, this time?"_

_"Yeah, I take care of what I need to take care of--I think a calm life on the water would suit me just fine."_

***

The reefs are... gorgeous this far out. Crystalline, colors that are warped from the surface but _below_ , below they are effervescent, shimmering, beautiful, loud. They remind him of Jester. 

Sometimes, times like this, he misses The Mighty Nein, what they were, and what they could have become, had he been there to see it through. But it has been some years since their goodbye, Fjord, clutching the ropes of The Ball-Eater, watching his friends watch him from the dock. 

_"Are you sure, Fjord?" Caleb had asked him, something temperate in his posture, unsure, hesitant._

_"I'm sure. This crazy snake god of mine isn't anyone else's problem. I need to figure out this shit without putting you all into danger." Fjord had nodded at Nott then, "'sides, you guys have somewhere else you need to be."_

_"We will... miss you." Caleb had finally said, awkwardly, after a long beat of silence. The deck of The Ball-Eater had seemed expansive between them, suddenly, as though they were on different sides of the same coin. Fjord had held out his hand, scarred palm face-up._

_"You'll make it work." He'd said._

_Caleb had taken that palm in his, scarred palm to scarred palm, and whispered, "We'll make it work."_   

Fjord swims closer to the reef, taking in the vibrant fish that flit between the coral. He almost reaches out to touch, but holds back, watching the undersea life go about its business.

There's a tug on the rope around his waist, enough to gain his attention without wrenching him across the sternum. Fjord heeds its call, swimming up and up and up, until he breaks the surface. He gasped, fingers touching his neck where the magic is doing its work, shifting from ocean-breathing to air, and Fjord cancels the spells with a tight wave of his hand. 

A large hand leans into the water above Fjord's nose, and Fjord takes it, letting the familiar rough grip pull him up and back onto the ship. Orly huffs at him, clapping him on the shoulder. "Cap'n." 

"Orly." Fjord grins and claps the turtle on the back. "You called?" 

Orly nods, sniffs. "Looks like a v-v-vessel on the horizon, Cap'n."  

Fjord's eyebrow raises, "this far out? Interestin'." He starts across the deck. The Ball-Eater, over the years, has taken a bit of wear and tear but its held up with some maintenance and a steady hand. There is still a circular scorch mark that has etched itself into the deck, and Fjord is too nostalgic to get rid of it. They'd changed out the colors, gotten a proper license and made themselves less of a pirate ship and more of a fishing vessel, doing work in trade mostly for merchant ships they catch in need of resupply. Fjord wasn't expecting to find anyone this far out of the coast, most of the merchant vessels don't stray this far out, and Fjord has made sure to keep their course as far from Darktow and The Revelry as possible. Despite the color change, Fjord's sure that any of the pirates and the Plank King too, would recognize the ship for what it is and shoot them on side if they even skirted Darktow's waters. 

Fjord has no interest of going back there.

Marius hands him a spyglass and Fjord trains it off into the distance where the man points. There is a vessel, small, haphazard and looking like it is on the last of its sea legs. _Nothing to be afraid of then_ , Fjord thinks. Just probably an unlucky crew that got snapped at by a flock of harpies, or drove themselves too close to the reefs and got their haul chewed up in the process. He watches it through the spyglass, until he notices something else in the distance too. A larger boat, dark colors, gaining on the smaller boat fast. 

Pirates. Fjord hisses, and snaps the spyglass closed. 

"Looks like they might need a little help." Fjord calls over to Orly who huffs. He turns to Marius, "Tell Nipsy to turn us around, keep us steady, wait for their approach. And tell Faraday to get the cannons ready. When the pirate ship is in range, she has my full approval to shoot." Marius salutes him and hurries up to the wheel.

Fjord hurries down to the deck, heading to the side of the ships and clutching tight to the railing. The small ship is barely hanging on, crawling really, and Fjord winces when he sees how battered the poor thing is. What an unlucky crew, running into a pirate ship out here.

They ships drew within firing range, and The Ball-Eater reacted accordingly. A shot rang out from the hull of the ship, Faraday at work, and the cannons lodged themselves in the pirate ship's mast. It teetered and collapsed and Fjord smirked, pleased. Faraday fire a second time, this time it went long, just crazing the side of the ship. The pirate ship began to turn, to retaliate, and the smaller ship gained distance. Fjord bit his lip. It would be too dangerous to let the pirate ship turn and fire. They could sink the smaller vessel with one more hit. 

There was something he could do.

Fjord rubs his wrists. It's been a long time since he's used his powers for anything but fishing. Uk'otoa doesn't talk to him much these days, they've come to something like an unsteady truce. Fjord had not initially freed the old snake god--he'd been unable to put the last orb into the final temple, after finally making it there, staring at the indentation in the floor where the orb was supposed to go. Uk'otoa had been furious when Fjord had left, had taken away his powers for days, and days, until Fjord had given the snake god an ultimatum.

"You need me. I have the last orb. We're gonna make a deal, you and I. If you want to be free." He'd threatened. 

Now, they were in something like a strange bonded relationship. Fjord had the power of the ocean, Uk'otoa had his freedom. Occasionally the old god made a visit in Fjord's dreams,  _Watching_ , he'd say, to Fjord's exasperation. Five years down the road, and the old god still refused to use full sentences.   

Fjord closed his eyes. _Uk'otoa, you listening? I need you to lend me a little more power._

There was an answering rumble, a curt,  _Watching,_ Fjord could see tendrils of a long body in his peripheral vision, slithering past, eyes blinking. 

_So you understand what I'm asking of you?_

_Potential._

Fjord blinked in his mind's eye, _What? Who?_

_Power. Reward._

Fjord opened his eyes. He could feel the power coursing through his fingertips, ready for his command. Uk'otoa was feeling generous today. Usually the sea god gave him very little when he asked, petty. Fjord liked to think, after five years, they'd reached some sort of understanding, but his god was still a little shit sometimes.

 _This_ , this was new. 

Fjord focused on the pirate ship, its dark mast and darker shadow, and raises his hand. Water surged up from the ocean, rising with his command, on opposite sides of the ship, like a wall. The two halves rose well over the sides of the ship, high above the mast. Fjord turned his fingers over, and the water rushed to his direction, spilling down on top of the ship with such force, that the masts cracked and splintered, the ship's deck and hull cleaved themselves in half by the pressurized water, and the ship sank beneath the onslaught within moments.

Fjord let his hand fall, watching with a little guilt as he saw pirates swimming about the sea, ship-less. At least some had survived. 

Vaughn whistled, low, and Fjord glared at the deckhand half-heartedly. The dwarf only snickered and continued with his work. The crew of the Ball-Eater had gotten used to Fjord's display of magic by now. He didn't use it often, but sometimes he'd had to ask Uk'otoa for a little more power in order to save their hides from something or other. 

The little ship had reached them now, safe from a pursing enemy but still a breath's away from collapse. Fjord rounded up his crew. "Help them on board." He called, and his crew got to work. 

It didn't take long, the crew of the Spider's Glance was a small crew, a caravan's crew, meant for postal service mostly. The ship was built for speed, but, as their captain told Fjord once she was on board, the pirate ship had surprised them, got in a lucky hit and they'd been limping along since. 

"Thank you for your assistance." The elven captain, Priscilla she'd insisted Fjord call her, said. She had wiry hair, straw-like, in a plait down her back. "I don't think we would have survived much longer without you." 

"No trouble." Fjord said, flashing his teeth. His tusks had grown out completely now, and he'd taken to the name Tusktooth, as much a reminder of his time with The Mighty Nein as it was an embracing of his nature. "Your cargo get out alright?"

Priscilla rubbed her arms. "Ah, you could say that. Our cargo this time around is a little... different from usual." 

Fjord raised an eyebrow, intrigued and suspicious, as Priscilla waved to her crew to bring whatever it was on board. 

Whatever it was was a person. A human. 

A familiar human. 

"Caleb?" Fjord breathed, his heart thumping fast. 

Caleb Widogast looked up, a small smile on his lips, " _Hallo_ , Fjord." 

***

They were staring at each other across the map table, Fjord with his arms crossed and Caleb's arms loose. 

Caleb looked good. His hair was longer, pulled back in a small ponytail, and he was wearing a clean set of robes. He still had a beard, but it was tamed and clean, and his eyes were soft without the lines. Fjord felt like was looking at a stranger. 

"It is... good to see you again, old friend." Caleb said, mouth still ticked up in a smile. And that was probably the strangest part. Caleb smiling, freely. 

"I'm... still trying to wrap my head around it all." Fjord said, confusion mixing with the fast thump of his heart. "What are you doin' out here?" 

Caleb's smile went softer. Fjord stared. "It is... a long story. The short of it is that I am here on business for the Dynasty."

Fjord's eyes bulged "The Dynasty? As in Xhorhas? What sorta stuff did you and everyone get into?"

Caleb chuckled and Fjord stared harder, thrown. "I have missed your voice." 

Fjord's heart thumped harder. "Yeah, I've missed the lot of you all too. Jester's pranks and Beau's gruffness, Caduceus' tea, Yasha's silences, and even my and Nott's fights." He looked down, embarrassed, "missed your cat, even." 

Caleb's smile widened, "Ah, Frumpkin has missed you as well." He snapped his fingers and a tabby cat popped into existence on the table. Frumpkin meowed and strode to Fjord, rubbing his feline whiskers into the cup of Fjord's hand. "There is a lot that has happened." 

"I'll say." Fjord grunted, withholding a sneeze as he gently nudged Frumpkin back to Caleb's side. "You'll have to give me the rundown eventually." 

" _Ja_ ," Caleb nodded, and then looked up and his eyes lingered on Fjord's mouth, "and you, you have changed." He said, and Fjord realized he meant his tusks. His hand lifted to them, gently brushed against the tooth. 

"Yeah, grown em out. Figured I'd give the name some meanin' after all." 

"You still go by Tusktooth, then?" 

"Yeah," Fjord put his hand down, closed his eyes. "Wanted to keep somethin' of you guys with me." 

Caleb didn't say anything, and when Fjord opened his eyes he could see Caleb looking over Fjord's shoulder and absentmindedly swiping his thumb against the inside of his palm. " _Ja_ , I understand that." He murmured.  

"Seriously Caleb," Fjord said, getting the wizard's attention. "You look... you look good." Fjord swallowed, embarrassed. "Less... tortured." He winced but Caleb only nodded, smile going rueful. 

" _Ja_ , there was a time when I thought that my problems were the most important thing in the world, but I have since come to understand that the world is much bigger than that." 

 _Potential_. Fjord flinched, and then balked. Had Uk'otoa meant _Caleb_ when he'd said as much earlier to Fjord? But why? 

"Are you alright?" Caleb asks, brow furrowed and Fjord waves his concern away.

"Peachy. Just dealin' with the ole--" he tapped his skull.

Caleb's eyes widened slightly. "I saw the way that the ship was destroyed..." He paused, and then leaned in, conspiratorially. "Uk'otoa... Did you... release him?"

"Sort of." Fjord admitted. "We have somethin' of an arrangement." 

"I am hoping it is more fruitful than your previous one." 

Fjord shrugged. "We get by." 

Caleb leaned back, eyes still narrowed, and it was familiar and nostalgic and it brought Fjord back to a similar stage in his memories, he and Caleb staring across from each other, an altar between them, Caleb scrutinizing him across a pool of welling blood. 

_"We understand each other." Fjord had said, reaching across that divide._

Fjord thinks, now, with five years of clarity between then and the present, that maybe they hadn't understood each other at all.

But they might be able to now.

Fjord clenched his hand with the scar tighter, pressed against his hip, feeling the way the skin pinched. "Do you think... if I hadn't left... do you think that things would be different?"

"Of course," Caleb said, bemused. "For one, we would not be meeting five years later after not having seen each other, out on the open sea."  

Fjord rolled his eyes. "I meant, you and me, would we be different?"

Caleb looked at him, really looked, not just seeing a new Fjord, fives years older, a little grayer, more tusks, and Fjord looked back, not just seeing a clean-shaven, calmer man. They were two sides of the same coin again, just as they had been when they had said their goodbyes, standing on the deck of The Ball-Eater, shaking hands. 

"I think that," Caleb began. "There are things that would be different, but I think we would have made our way here eventually, perhaps it might have taken longer, or shorter, but I think that... this is where we were meant to be." 

Fjord huffed a laugh despite himself. "Been listening to Duece's talks of destiny and fate too much, huh?" 

Caleb smirked. "He can be quite convincing, you know, after the thousandth time of hearing it." 

Fjord laughed, covered his mouth to hide the chortles of it as it wracked his body. It had been a long time since he had felt laughter like this. 

 _Potential._ Uk'otoa whispered, sounding pleased, and Fjord ignored him. 

"You should get some rest." He said, reaching over to pat Caleb's shoulder. Caleb looked down at Fjord's hand on his shoulder and Fjord blinked and released him. "Sorry, forgot you don't really like touchin' unless it's on your terms."

"No, that was not it." Caleb said, and then he nodded, walking past Fjord and heading for the door. " _Ja_ , I will head to bed. Too much excitement for my old age." 

"Hey, we're still in our thirties." Fjord argued, and Caleb laughed at him as he left the room.   

 _Potential._ Uk'otoa said again, insistently and Fjord muttered, "Shut it, you. I don't know what you're thinkin' but it ain't good, I bet."  

 _Learn._ He said, and went silent. 

***

The next day was a strange one. Fjord went about his tasks as he always did, taking care of their duties, commanding the ship, keeping their company comfortable, but there was the ever-present feeling of eyes on his back as he got to work. Caleb followed him from afar, watching him with a strange expression on his face. Eventually, Fjord couldn't take it anymore, and he confronted him about it. Caleb had merely shrugged. "It has been a very long time since we have seen each other, Fjord. I am just curious." 

Afterwards, Caleb had taken to sketching and transcribing on the bow of the ship, looking out at the sea. He was playing with a yarn ball he'd taken out of his pocket. He kept throwing it into the air and then casting his spell which made it return to his palm, or sped up its movement, sending it across the ship and then back into his hand. His movements were sure and succinct, from memorization, and Fjord became distracted watching Caleb mouth words to himself, moving his fingers in rapid patterns. 

Fjord approached Caleb, interested, in the strange and different magic he was using. "What sorta spell is that?" He said, kneeling down.

Caleb looked up, surprised. "Ah, I did not see you there, Fjord." He smiled tentatively, fingers twisting around the yarn ball. "It is... manipulation of time. Dunamancy." 

"Sounds familiar. I think I heard Beau say somethin' similar once."

" _Ja_ , It is something that I studied in Xhorhas with a master." 

"That's amazing, Caleb." Fjord praised, intrigued. "You always blew me away with your skill in magic, you know." 

Caleb's cheeks reddened. " _Ja_. Would you like me to show you some spells?" 

The days passed in relative peace, with Caleb showing Fjord all the things he'd learnt, and Fjord telling Caleb about his adventures on the sea, and about his arrangement with Uk'otoa. Caleb seemed fascinated with his relationship to the sea god, commenting that it sounded similar to Jester's friendship with The Traveler. Fjord had scoffed. 

"Uk'otoa is more like a dramatic teenager with a short-temper." He'd argued.  

After that comment, Uk'otoa had made sure that Fjord couldn't use his powers for the rest of that day. 

 

"Captain!" Faraday called. Fjord turned from his conversation with Caleb to the young human girl with wine-colored hair. She was busy juggling two barrels filled with gunpowder in her hands. "Delivery from the cargo hold!" 

Fjord rose and took one of the barrels from her. "Here. Lemme help you." 

She grinned, teeth crooked and charming. "You sure you can handle it, Captain? You aren't as young as the rest of us, you know."

Fjord grinned back at her, "I ain't that old yet." He bumped their hips together to get Faraday to stumble. She nearly dropped the barrel, laughing as she righted herself and pointed at the barrel he was holding. 

"That one's for the mess, actually. Filled with fruits and stuff." She used her free hand to pat his arm companionably before heading back down to the cannons. Fjord hoisted the barrel against his hip, turning back to Caleb.

"Let me take this down to the mess a minute, okay?" He asked. But Caleb was looking at him curiously, and Fjord paused. "What?" 

Caleb hesitated, eyes glancing off in Faraday's direction before landing back on Fjord. "You seem... quite close." 

"Well sure, they're my crew. Known most of them for going on four years now, you know." Fjord grinned. "Aside from Orly and Marius, I picked up the lot of them some time back after going to that last temple of Uk'otoa's." 

Caleb nodded, still looking hesitant, before he said, "do you have a... sweetheart?" 

Fjord felt his face instantly heat. "Jesus, Caleb. Where's the question comin' from?" 

Caleb nodded in Faraday's direction and Fjord flushed even further. "Oh, no, she's a kid, Caleb. I'm near twice her age."

"Someone else then?" 

"No." Fjord insisted, adjusting the barrel to keep it from falling. "Never had the urge." 

Caleb sat up, leaning forward, hand on his chin. "Why not?"

Fjord shrugged, giving up and putting the barrel down. He hadn't gotten any stronger strength-wise in five years, even if he could control the ocean with a flick of his wrist. "Was too distracted, I suppose. Focused. That first year was dealin' with Uk'otoa and our 'bond'" he emphasizes the word, stressing it out with a curl over the ridiculousness of it all. "And after that, well," Fjord shrugs again. "didn't find anyone I was interested in as much as--" he cuts himself off, suddenly nervous he might have revealed a little too much but Caleb is still looking at him, waiting for him to elaborate, and Fjord clears his throat and deflects, "And you?"

Caleb blinked. "What of me?"

"Do you have a sweetheart?" He thinks about it a moment, and then adds. "Maybe Jester?" 

Caleb's nose wrinkles. "Jester? No. She was too busy mooning after you to notice me, not that either of us would have wanted that." 

Fjord splutters. "Me?" 

Caleb rolls his eyes. "You are quite oblivious, Fjord. Do you not remember her dagger-eyes when you were gallivanting around with Avantika?" 

If Fjord thinks very hard about it, he does remember death glares from Jester during that time. "Maybe." He admits, sheepish. 

Caleb smirks. "Do not fret, my friend. She has sufficiently moved on from you." 

"That's good. I'm sorry if I caused her any grief." Fjord hesitates. "How is she doing? And the others?" 

Caleb smiles, something fond in the curl of his mouth and the softness of his eyes. Fjord is fascinated by the way Caleb's face can go so soft. He doesn't remember it ever doing that all those years ago. Caleb had been sufficiently hard to read, all hard lines and furrowed brow, but he has since softened immeasurably, and Fjord is both relieved to see it, and sad he was not there to witness the transformation. "They are all well. We are in separate parts of the world at the moment, dealing with our own parts to play in this deal we have with the Dynasy. Jester and Beauregard are in Zadash with the Cobalt Soul, Nott is with her husband--" 

"Husband?!" Fjord interrupts, and Caleb blinks and then his smile widens. "Ah, yes, that is a long story for another time." He continues, "Caduceus is at his temple with his family and Yasha is with her god."  

"Jesus." Fjord mutters. "Her husband..." 

Caleb chuckles and touches Fjord's arm. "There is much that you do not know." The light touch sends skitters of sensation up Fjord's spine. It is a far cry from the companionable touch Faraday had given him earlier. 

He'd thought his silly crush had been something he'd beaten back years ago. Apparently all it needed was a clean-upped Caleb turning up five years later to kick-start his heart again. 

 _Potential._ Uk'otoa whispers in Fjord's mind, and Fjord flinches and then glares at the ground. 

"You alright?" Caleb asks, confused. 

"Yeah, sorry." Fjord reassures. He reaches for the barrel and picks it up, stepping out of Caleb's touch. "Gonna bring this down to the mess. Be back in a sec." 

Caleb nods and returns to his transcribing and Fjord escapes. 

***

When he comes across Caleb next, it's when he knocks on Caleb's makeshift quarters. There is no response, so Fjord gently pushes open the door. "Caleb?" He calls, and catches sight of a lean, pale, freckled back before he squeaks and quickly about faces. 

"Shit! Sorry!" Fjord apologies, muscles tensing up. 

"It is no trouble." Caleb says, amused. "You can look." He adds, and Fjord, despite himself, peeks. 

Caleb is working on slipping his hands into a long-sleeved shirt, the muscles of his back shifting as he stretches. Fjord's eyes glance to the expanse of naked skin and he gulps. But then, his eyes catch sight of a line of discolored skin on Caleb's side and he gulps for an entirely different reason. 

"Caleb... are those burns?" He asks and Caleb blinks and looks down and then makes a noise of surprise. 

"Ah, I forgot." He lifts up his shirt a bit and Fjord gets a better look at them. They are definitely burns, but not from fire. It looks as though they were caused by electricity, the scars like lightning patterns across Caleb's entire lower left side. 

"My... mentor, not from Xhorhas but the first, I may have told you his name the once before, Trent Ikithon. This was his handiwork." Fjord winces as Caleb pulls the shirt over his burns and turns to face Fjord fully. "Do not worry," He says, when he sees Fjord's expression. "Ikithon is very much dead." 

"Good." Fjord says, through gritted teeth. "'Cause I'd have gone out to find him right now if he wasn't." 

Caleb's eyes soften. "You are a good friend, Fjord." 

Fjord looks away, feeling hot under the collar. "Kinda wish I'd been there to see the guy get what he deserved, though." 

 _Potential,_ Uk'otoa says. 

"Shut up." Fjord growls.  

"Fjord?" Caleb asks, confused and Fjord chuckles uncomfortably.

"Sorry, not you. Was talkin' to snake-face." 

"You speak to him... often then?"

"When he's bein' especially talkative, which isn't all that common, honestly. He just seems to be extra lonely or somethin'." Fjord taunts.

 _Watching_. Uk'otoa says, low, and it speaks of five years of their strange relationship that Fjord can understand the way the god inflects his voice, because Uk'otoa definitely sounds annoyed with him.  

 _What's with you lately?_ Fjord thinks to Uk'otoa, and Uk'otoa responds with a vision. Uk'otoa never shows him visions anymore, it's always just words. This vision is different though. It's just Caleb, staring at him across the room, looking confused but smiling fondly at him. _Potential_. Uk'otoa says, and Fjord watches Caleb reach out and cup his cheek. 

Fjord's heart thumps, and then he feels himself pale with realization.  _You've been trying to--what the fuck._

 _Watching._  Uk'otoa says, and he sends Fjord another vision. This vision is of Fjord, several years ago, less gray in his hair, stretched out on his bed with his hand fisting his cock as he bites his lip, moaning Caleb's name. _Watching._ Uk'otoa says again, and he definitely sounds smug. 

 _Fuck you._ Fjord hisses back, flushed from the vision, horrified and embarrassed both. 

"Are you sure you're okay?" Caleb asks, startling Fjord with his words and his sudden proximity. Caleb had gotten closer, enough that if Fjord reached out, he could cup Caleb's face in his hands like he'd seen Caleb do to him in Uk'otoa's vision. 

"F-fine." Fjord says, and his voice cracks, accent slipping, and Caleb raises an eyebrow at him. Fjord backs away. "I'm fine, really." Fjord tries again, and then he turns on his heel. "Apologies for bargin' in. I'll take my leave." And he rushes out. 

***

Caleb finds him later, on his shift at the helm, when he can't escape. Fjord tries at first to ignore him and focus on steering the ship, but Caleb makes it very difficult when he stands in front of the wheel so Fjord is forced to look right at him. 

"Are you done hiding from me?" Caleb asks, arms crossed. 

Fjord looks away, shame-faced. "I wasn't hidin'." He lies. 

"Right." Caleb says, unconvinced. "Well, there was something important I wished to speak to you about."

Fjord sighs and nods. "Sorry, yeah, go ahead." 

Caleb goes quiet for a long moment, looking off into the distance and thinking. Fjord stares at him, watches the way the sunset makes the shadows of his face stand out. He is wearing his hair pinned back again, tendrils of it escaping his tie. 

"My current position with the Dynasty requires me to make a visit to Darktow," Caleb admits and Fjord looks at him. "But we're banned from there." Fjord reminds him and Caleb nods. 

" _Ja,_ but this is something that The Bright Queen needs done personally and I volunteered even though I knew the risks." He looks away. "Do you want to know why?" 

"Are you going to tell me if I ask?" Fjord counters and Caleb chuckles. 

"It is because I had hoped that I would run into you." Caleb tells him, looking up and catching Fjord's eyes. Fjord's mouth goes dry. "I wanted to see you again." Caleb admits. His hands are playing with the scar on his palm again. "I have... I have missed you." 

Fjord swallows. "I've missed you too, Caleb." He whispers, feeling his face flush with heat. 

"You asked me." Caleb continues, looking at his hands. "Earlier. Why I have not found someone. Ever since Astrid," He pauses and smiles, "that is another story to tell you--ever since Astrid, I had felt that I did not deserve love. That any one person I should meet who I came to... care for... would only be in danger should they get close to me." He looks up then, something brave in the set of his jaw. "There was another that I fell in love with... but I believed myself to be unworthy so I did not voice my affections. We parted ways, and I never got the chance to tell them how I felt." He pauses again, jaw working as he tries to come up with words. "I felt, at the time, before they had left, that perhaps my love was not one-sided. But it was too late to do anything about it." 

"Caleb..." Fjord whispers. He'd been holding his breath ever since Caleb had started talking, hoping against hope.

Caleb steps closer, the wheel the only thing separating them. "I am hoping that I can ask the question I have been wanting to know the answer to for five years now." 

"Ask it." Fjord pleads, swallowing down the roughness in his throat. 

"Could you... find it in yourself... to love me?" He asks.

"It's not a question of whether or not I could love you, Caleb." Fjord breathes, and admits, "Because I do, I think I always have. Loved you for these five years, I'd just been trying to pretend I wasn't." 

Caleb exhales, his eyes softer than Fjord has ever seen them yet, and his hand reaches across the wheel and cups Fjord's cheek, just as he had in Uk'otoa's vision. 

 _Reward._ Uk'otoa says, smug, and Fjord would tell him off if he wasn't so pleased right now. 

They stay like that, Fjord tucked into Caleb's hand, Caleb's thumb swiping at the skin under Fjord's eye, until Caleb draws his hand back. "There is... something else." Caleb admits. 

Fjord nods. "I'm listening." 

"That favor that I asked of you all those years ago." Caleb swallows and looks away a moment, wrestling with himself. Fjord waits, patient. Caleb looks back at him, meets his eyes. "Is that still..."

"Always." Fjord replies. He can't help himself. He reaches up, across the top of the wheel, and tucks a strand of Caleb's hair behind his ear. Caleb breathes out shakily. 

"I--I would like your help with this... this deal with the Dynasty, this mission of mine." He looks down. "If you are amendable to leave your comfortable life by the sea behind to help me, and our friends." 

"Be a part of the Mighty Nein again?" 

" _Ja_ , if you would." 

"I don't know if I ever really left it." Fjord replies, grinning, and Caleb smiles back. 

**Author's Note:**

> This one I rushed on because I underestimated how much time I'd have to work on it D: And I was still late, lol.


End file.
